Do a Motive Inventory

“People may be pure in their own eyes, but the Lord examines their motives.”

(Proverbs 3:15)

After more than twenty years of unhappy marriage, Gina and I realized we got married for many wrong reasons. That’s the moment when many marriages end. If we’re honest, many of us would admit our motives for getting married were mostly self-serving. When myself isn’t served, it’s easy to quit.

Thankfully, we didn’t take that path. Instead, we turned to God, because we believed he had a higher purpose surrounding our marriage. In time, our marriage healed and became healthy, better than we could have imagined.

I meet people who make major decisions based on their own desires, and insist God led them. A few years later their lives are a train wreck.

Unexamined, faulty motives typically produce wrong outcomes, often at a high cost of time, money, and wounded relationships that can take many years to repair, if at all.

Our desires can twist our motives and blind us from seeing reality. Yet God wants good for us, often more than we want for ourselves. His motives are for our best.

Here’s a suggestion: Before you make a major decision, get some experienced, truth-telling friends to help you examine your motives. Take plenty of time trying to discern whether your motives are truly godly.